Believing Bailey by Linda Kage

Author:Linda Kage
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Omnific Publishing
Published: 2017-11-03T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 21

BAILEY

I couldn’t believe my eyes. I just…I couldn’t.

Beckett was standing there, surrounded by bottles of prescription pills and staring at them with longing and temptation.

“Oh my God, ohmigod!” I shrieked, hurrying to him and snagging the bottle he hadn’t dropped from his hand. “How many have you taken?”

I needed to get him to the hospital. Right now. They’d have to pump his stomach, get every single pill out. Oh my God, but what if I was too late? What if—

“None,” he said, shaking his head in instant denial. “I didn’t take any. I mean, I took two ibuprofens, but that was it. I was in pain. I just wanted…” He shook his head some more.

But he looked so guilty and caught-in-the-act. I didn’t think I could believe him. I rattled the prescription bottle in his face. “Then why did you pull all these down?”

“I…” He looked at the bottle, his expression filled with even more mortification and guilt.

“Oh my God,” I whispered, terrified to my core. Helping him through a hard time was one thing, but going on suicide watch for him was quite another.

When he looked at me, though, he could only shake his head. “I was just looking at them. Curious,” he tried to explain. “I wasn’t going to take them. I swear, I didn’t take any.”

I threw down the bottle into the sink and gripped his arms, shaking him roughly. “Then look me in the eye and swear to me that taking all these didn’t even cross your mind.”

He looked at me, his bright blue eyes so red and tormented. When his face crumpled with defeat, I knew it had crossed his mind.

“Oh, Beck.”

“I didn’t take any,” he swore.

“But what about tomorrow?” I exploded. “What happens when I leave you alone again? How the hell can I not worry it won’t cross your mind tomorrow, but maybe just a little more persistently the next time? Holy shit, Beck, I can’t deal with this. I can’t…I don’t do drama and emotion and freaking nervous breakdowns. I can’t even deal with my own hard times. When the going gets tough, I run to the hair salon and get my hair dyed. I can’t deal with anything! Now you’re standing here, contemplating suicide and I’m the only fucking person on the planet who actually gives a shit enough to want to stop you. Oh my fucking God!”

I let him go to grip my head and spin away, unable to look at him. “Don’t do this to me. How could you…” I whirled back. “What do you think it would’ve done to me to come in here and find you dead just now?”

“Jesus,” he breathed, stepping close to touch the side of my head. “I wouldn’t do that to you, Bailey. I won’t. I swear it. I don’t know what I was thinking. The thought just barely crossed my mind.” His lips parted with a terrible kind of realization before he quietly added, “And it wasn’t terrible.”

“Yes, it goddamn well is terrible,” I shrieked like a banshee, basically screaming at the top of my lungs.

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